For all the moms out there striving to make the holidays special for your kids, but forever feeling held back by MS fatigue, this episode is your holiday lifeline. Juggling the magic of the holiday season with the reality of MS fatigue is not easy. You never want to feel like you're choosing between your children and your health, but some days that's exactly what it feels like. Let's talk about how to create meaningful and memorable holidays without it coming at the expense of your health. This episode is your guide to balancing holiday cheer with self-care. And my fellow Multiple Sclerosis sisters, if you want a more personalized approach to creating your MS diet and lifestyle, check out my private coaching program. It includes a comprehensive assessment, personalized strategies, and lifestyle support.

Each month, I only accept three new clients. So if you're interested, apply now at Alenebrennan. com/ coach. Now on to today's episode. There are 1 million people diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in the US. So that makes you one in a million. And you have a special purpose in this world that no diagnosis can take away from you. So if you are ready to reclaim your body, mind and life from multiple sclerosis, welcome to my MS podcast. I'm your host, Alene Brennan. Okay, we decorated our Christmas tree this weekend. Yes, the same weekend of Thanksgiving. And oh, by the way, also the same weekend that we celebrated my daughter's birthday. There's so much fun tucked in there, but it was also exhausting. And now that my daughter is becoming more aware of what's going on around her, I want to make everything so special and memorable for her. I waited a long time to become a mom and it's finally here and she's the best. I want to make everything so special for her, which by the way, to all of the moms who have

it easy, she looked at me and said, 'Alene, Christmas is a production.' Every year when you have kids, it doesn't matter how old they are. Christmas is a production and it's exhausting. Would you agree? Whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, or another holiday, the holiday season is inescapable and exhausting. And that can be said for the most energetic person, let alone those of us living with MS fatigue. We can really feel torn when it feels like you have to choose between your family responsibilities and your personal health. Why does it have to be one or the other? And if you're like me, you're always trying to push that line so far as you can get

away with a good enough approach. This whole concept of having multiple trees in your home that you have to put up and light and decorate and clean up after and maintain and all the things. I don't know who started that, but that was an awful idea. No, no, do one tree. Now, I grew up in a home where we always, always had a fresh tree. I love the smell of a fresh Christmas tree in my home. That's part of the holiday experience to me. But guess what? Having an artificial tree with the lights already wrapped around it is so much easier.

Perfect. So you can recreate things. You just have to get a little creative, but embrace a good enough decorating approach. You don't have to do everything to the nines. What's most meaningful? Just allow yourself to focus on what is most meaningful. It's important, in my opinion, to have the Christmas tree up, to have it lit. So we do that early. And that often means that we're doing it on Thanksgiving weekend, which isn't the wisest. So if you wanted to spread that out, you certainly could do so. But again, just how can you trim your holiday decorating just a little bit in a way that doesn't feel like you're compromising, like you can still make it look and feel really nice,

So embrace a good enough decorating approach. Next, simplify gift giving. So I actually shared in a recent episode, some creative ways that you can not only have some really meaningful gifts, but do them on a budget. So definitely check out that episode if you haven't done so already, but you could also consider doing a holiday gift exchange with the family.

However many kids you had in your family is how many kids you would pull out to buy for. And it actually worked out just as well because then you weren't getting a whole lot of smaller gifts. You were actually able to get like one nicer gift. So from a kid's perspective, we loved it. And from the adult perspective, they loved it because they were buying for like one or two kids instead of like 15. So whether you're doing this with extended family, or you're doing this with the adults in your family, or even if you're doing it with coworkers, how can you trim down on the number of gifts you're buying? Because look, the reality is that requires extra thought of what you're buying, shopping, dealing with wrapping. It's extra presents to wrap.

And then it's also extra on your budget. And that's stressful in and of itself. So how can you simplify gift giving? Does that look like an exchange for you with any of the groups that you exchange gifts? Or can you check out my previous episode in learning about some really creative ways to have some meaningful gifts that don't break the bank? Next up, plan for rest and downtime. I remember going to the doctor's office. I think this had to have been like in my early days of a diagnosis when I was meeting with what felt like everyone in the entire world. And one of the doctors asked me what I did to manage stress. And I was like, oh, I exercise. I really enjoy it. And the doctor's like, that's nice.

That's really helpful. That's not relaxing. And I was like, no, no, no. Like it really does help me to release stress. And she says, yes, I agree with you. It is good to manage stress. That's not restful though. There is a difference. What do you do to just rest? And I was like, uh, I don't know. That's a good question, Doc. I don't have an answer to it. And I'm willing to bet many of you listening to this may not have an answer to that either because we're just, we're busy and it can easily feel like you're constantly doing one more thing on your list or just crashing at the end of the day because you're fresh out of energy. But what if you actually took the time?

To have some rest, like just enjoyable relaxation. This is something that I have really been trying to be intentional with adding back into my day, my week, my routine, because this year, this was a really intense year for me, a really intense year for a variety of reasons. And I am definitely feeling the fallout of that now because it feels like I got through a lot of storms this year. And now it's like the, you know how like after a period of stress, you're just like. And it just feels like your body is like, I desperately need some TLC and some rest. So I'm trying to kind of like leverage the holidays as in like more encouragement and emphasis for myself to do this. But this is something that I really tried to be intentional with. And for me, that looks like reading on my Kindle a little bit before bedtime at night. So it starts with like 15 minutes, going to bed 15 minutes earlier, because I previously was like, I'm not a strong reader. Like I'll just fall asleep. I don't really want to do that. But then I got into a good book.

I got so inspired. I actually just bought a new pillow for me to read in bed more comfortably. I mean, I'm all in now. And then there's a different book that I enjoy reading in the morning. So my end of the day book is one that is just like entertainment. It's just brain candy, as I say. And then the books that I read in the morning, those are more intellectual or like I sometimes call them my smart books. So those are ones where I need my brain refreshed. I'm not going to be like as engaged with them at the end of the day. But still, that's something that's relaxing that I enjoy first thing in the morning. So what are some things that you do that are just restful?

I was just talking with a client recently. She too has gone through a really busy and intense season. And she has off for the holidays. And she's like, 'Alene.' I just want to lay in bed in the morning and not feel like I have to jump out of bed for the alarm clock and to go off to work. Or I just want to lay on the couch and like just watch TV. Bottom line, I don't want to have an agenda or a schedule. Oh, how lovely that sounds. Now, let's bring it back to the context of this conversation. We're talking about the craziness of the holidays. So yes, while we would all love to stay in bed a little bit longer, that's not realistic for us every day.

intense ride that you are going to be on. And it's going to have a lot of ups, but it's also going to have a lot of downs. And it is exhausting like you cannot imagine. And he's been spot on with that. I would say every aspect of that is true. Nonetheless, one of the things that he recommended to me, he's like, listen, just take one, I can't remember if he said like one afternoon a week or one hour in your day, but essentially like pick a time that you consistently can unplug and just focus on relaxation. And he really emphasized doing it at the same time.

Realistic in your day or in your week, but how can you help to plan for some rest and downtime? Because what you're doing is you're allowing your nervous system to just relax and reset so that when you go forward, you're able to show up better. So I would encourage you to not look at this as like a setback that I have a tendency to do. I'm like, but if I stop, then things stop getting done.

To help with wrapping gifts or decorating or planning whatever events that you have? How can they help chip in wherever is appropriate for them? So maybe you make a master list of like all the things that need to get done because that in and of itself can be really helpful to just get it out on paper. And then you start to chip away at it and you're like, this one, this one, my spouse can do. This one, the kids can do. This one, this is getting eliminated this year. No need for that. This one over here, this is a priority. I want to do that. I need to get that one done myself. But it can really help to just lighten the load and take it all off of you.

Okay, this next one, I had a lot of fun brainstorming for this. Can you create some new low-energy traditions? So think of some traditions that don't require a lot of energy for you to participate in, but they're also really enjoyable. This can be so many different things. I jotted down a couple ideas just to like create some inspiration or plant some seeds, but I'm hopeful that you'll be able to find something that works well for your family. So the first is a holiday movie marathon. Oh yes, please. And can I get an invitation because I want to come too. Have a cozy night in with whatever your favorite holiday movies are. Get a good blanket, get some popcorn or whatever it is.

If you're looking for a family-focused event, you could do some DIY ornaments. You can check Pinterest or even like Michael's, your local craft store, for some ideas on what materials that you need to get-but get some fabric, some ribbon, like whatever it is. How can you create some ornaments? And if you want to have them on your tree each year, go for it. And you can certainly save them year to year and kind of like reminisce on them. Or if you don't want them in your house, let it be a tradition.

If you just sit around one night and like reminisce on your favorite holiday stories, that could be so fun and so relaxing because you just get to sit there and relax. And the conversation's not on you all the time. You can kind of like bounce around to whoever is telling the story at the time. Next up, a neighborhood lights tour. So this one brings back personal memories for me, but the concept of it, like just hop in the car and drive around the different neighborhoods

It was exhausting. I was literally holding her 24/7, or at least that's what it felt like, anytime that she was not actively sleeping. I was holding her. And even when she was sleeping, many times I had to hold her to help her feel more comfortable. My arms were never so strong, but exhausted at the same time. I was never so exhausted. So bringing this back to the lights tour, many times after my husband would get done work, he would come in and see us and he would see me like struggling to keep my eyes open.

To get out into the world were really limited. So again, we put her in the car and there was this light show. It was probably about a 20-minute drive from our house. So it wasn't too far. And it was almost like a racetrack that you drove around and they had all these different lights up and it was just really pretty. So if you want to drive around different neighborhoods, you could also Google 'local light shows' or 'light tours' to see if there's anything in your area.

Apparently, there's some spirits that you can put in there to make them a little more jolly, but whatever it is, you could do something like that. That might be whether you're doing the hot chocolate or the spiked apple cider, depending upon who is coming and who you're serving, that might be adjusted there. You could do holiday sing-alongs. I mean, this could be one where everyone picks their favorite holiday song and you could even download like a karaoke app and make it fun.

So how can you find some low energy traditions or events that you can do? Again, I just brainstormed a couple with you, having the movie marathon night, doing some DIY ornaments, doing the local light show, having the hot chocolate or the spiked apple cider bar, having a storytelling night. There's a lot of different things that you can do. Or maybe there's something that you love to do.

or nursing homes. Okay. The other thing, kind of like going back to our main list here, plan simple holiday meals. Instead of a big elaborate holiday meal, can you do something just a little bit more simple? There are a lot of good recipes that you can do in a slow cooker or an Instapot, or at least have some things prepped ahead of time. Not everything needs to be made that particular day. You can stagger it. So maybe you're prepping things that can be frozen a week before, and then maybe you're

And last but not least, mindful shopping. how can you help to minimize the stress and the fatigue of holiday shopping? I shared in that that I have always been a big shopper. Black Friday is a big tradition in our family. So I feel like being a bargain hunter and like shopping, it's in my blood. It runs through my veins. But yet, I don’t have the tolerance or the enjoyment and satisfaction from it anymore. I want to get a list early. I want to order it online and be done with it. If I don’t have to go to a single store during the holidays, I’m okay with that. That would be wonderful. I get to avoid the crowds. I get to avoid the parking situations, the lines at the checkout. It’s just mayhem.

Now, if you do prefer those in-store shopping experiences, just try to go on off-peak hours. Don’t go on a Saturday. Can you go, even if you have to take off from work for a couple hours or leave a little early or take a longer lunch break, whatever it is, how can you get just a little bit of an off time to get some of that shopping done? And also consider supporting local businesses. I know as a small business owner myself,

single week is a lot of time planning, recording, editing, posting, promoting. It's a lot. So I know how much goes into running a small business and that when you can help to support small businesses anytime of year, but especially during the holidays, that means so, so much. So you can also consider shopping local, supporting your small businesses that can tend to have a

Share meaningful and budget-friendly gifts that will not cause a lot of stress. Plan for some rest and downtime. You can still keep exercising. That's great. Obviously, still sleep. But what are the things that you are doing just to rest and enjoy some downtime? What are some activities that you enjoy that you can do on a regular basis? Delegate holiday tasks. Get that brain dump out. Get everything out on paper. Start delegating.

And mindful shopping. Where can you buy online and how can you support small local businesses? There are certainly so many more ways to help avoid the holiday burnout when living with MS fatigue. And I want to hear the ones that work most effectively for you. So head on over to my blog, Alene Brennan.com/blog. I have a post for each and every episode. And that's where we keep the conversation going in the comments. So share what works best for you, and also head over there so you can get some new ideas as well. We can all learn from our collective knowledge together because we are all in this together. And the holiday cheer doesn't need to come at the expense of our health. We can balance holiday magic and self-care. And that's my holiday wish for you this season. Well, my friend, we've reached the end of this episode. Pick one lesson from today's discussion and put it into action now. It's time to reclaim your body, mind, and life from multiple sclerosis. And for more resources, events, and programs, head over to AleneBrennan. com. See you on the next episode of my MS podcast.